21 août 2009
Stone
Stone is the transmen who won't get naked when they're fucking you, much less let you fuck them. Stone is the sexworkers who won't let their clients kiss them. Stone is how sometimes you get ticklish and it's just the way your body says "don't touch me there". Stone is the butches who don't want my lipstick to get smeared on their lips when we make out, and the reason why I wear kiss-proof rouge a levres. Stone is how so many women won't trust anyone but themselves with their bodies enough to let go and cum. Stone is how I'll get tense if you get too close to my clit, and keep my hand ready to stop yours, clutched firmly around your arm, trying to keep control. Stone is how I'll fidget and wiggle under you, feeling trapped, not telling you I'm scared, just trying to reduce the harm, moving away from you with my hips, escaping as much as I can. "You're not doing anything wrong, just going places where I've been hurt", I whisper when you ask what's going on. Thank you for asking. Maybe stone is also how upset you got, how I felt you cringe, when your friend called you a name he says is your real name, and how relieved you felt that I didn't hear it. Stone is these experiences that queers have in common, these hard boundaries that pain has carved in our bodies, making us harden. In some places, my stone can be melted, if you do it right, if you're patient and listen. In others, it will remain hard as a rock.
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I have never heard someone talk about Femme stone before and I find it very validating! What a multifaceted ever changing stone it is indeed.
Did you read this article "Hats off to beautiful femmes"?
http://www.xtra.ca/public/National/Hats_off_to_beautiful_femmes-7215.aspx
This part was pretty powerful:
"I want you to know that I know it is not always easy to love me. That sometimes my chest is a field full of landmines and where you went last night you can’t go tomorrow. There is no manual, no roadmap, no helpline you can call. My body does not come with instructions, and sometimes even I don’t know what to do with it. This cannot be easy, but still, you touch me anyway."
Also please tell me the brand of your magical kiss free Rouge à Lèvres in hopes I might procure it outside of Paris!!!
salut
j'aime vraiment bien ce texte, dommage qu'il soit en anglais, même si je pense que c'est plutôt intraduisible.
Pour répondre à une question un peu plus haut... moi j'aime pas l'anglais, la lecture est pas très fluide, je préfère si t'écris en français.
J'espère que tu vas bien.
Bisous ma poule
S.
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